HUG THY NEIGHBOR
Romans 12:14-21
. . . your kids . . . . . . YOUR FATHER (DAD) . . .
HUGGING--A VISIBLE DEMONSTRATION OF OUR LOVE AND AFFECTION FOR OTHERS.
God's people ought to be known for visible demonstrations of love and affection for one other.
We’ve been considering IMPLICATIONS OF THE GOSPEL.
If God loved us so much, how should we respond?
* We respond by giving Him our lives–a one time gift–a living sacrifice.
* We respond by living for Him, a new lifestyle, a new mind set
* We respond by serving Him enthusiastically.
If God loved us so much, appropriate response: to love those He loves.
That’s the mark of God’s children; we love one another! We’re FAMILY!
Now Paul moves on to the hard part!
We’re used to telling ourselves we ought to love one another.
We’re about to consider some areas where this is easier said than done.
Next few chapters deal with some hard things from God’s Word
These aren’t hard because passage is hard to understand.
Problem: like adage: "I'm not nearly so concerned about parts of the Bible I can't understand as about parts I understand full well and don't put into practice."
No issue of Scripture stirs greater controversy than practical issues of love and submission. “You can’t live that way!”
This is different than normal people live! That’s the point!
God’s people are SUPPOSED to be different!
Mark that distinguishes God's people, GOD'S FAMILY TRADEMARK, is our LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER.
Paul tells us about "HUGS" we ought to give people around us.
7 COMMANDS RELATED TO HOW WE DEMONSTRATE LOVE 12:14-21
1st 3 "HUGS"—DEMONSTRATION OF LOVE FOR GOD'S PEOPLE 12:14-16
1) BLESS YOUR ENEMIES 14
When someone hurts us, we demonstrate love by seeking their welfare, NOT their downfall.
Sermon on the Mount:
Leaders of Israel: love your neighbor and hate your enemy.
Implication: our enemy doesn't qualify as a neighbor.
Christ: love your enemy; seek his welfare; pray for him (Matt. 5:43-48; Luke. 6:35-36).
Legal swamp: "I've got my rights!" "I've got it coming!" "I don't have to take that!"
Children sue parents Students sue teachers
Employees sue employers Spouses sue partners (not just unbelievers!)
Church people even sue pastors!
Cartoon: vocalist beside piano, mic in hand: “I'd like to share a song the Lord gave me a year ago ... even though He gave it to me, any reproduction of this song in any form without written permission constitutes infringement of copyright law which grants me the right to sue your socks off ... praise God...." (Swindoll)
2) IDENTIFY WITH ONE ANOTHER 15
Call to identify with others in sadness or joy.
Psalm 35:11-14 shows relationship between 1st 2 commands.
Love those who treat us wrongly; not just those who treat us well.
Difficult task: rejoice for our enemies when they triumph
Their success causes jealousy and frustration!
When enemy suffers, we sense satisfaction– We've been vindicated!
Not kind of love we ought to show for God's people.
We should seek welfare of others.
They have to give account to God for their actions
We’re to love them, and seek their welfare.
Chrysostom: "It requires more of a high Christian temper to rejoice with them that rejoice than to weep with them that weep. There’s none so hard-hearted as not to weep over him that’s in calamity; but the other requires a very noble soul, so as not only to keep from envying, but even to feel pleasure with the person who is in esteem." —especially true if it’s an enemy!
3) Concerning 3rd command
Next 4 commands tied together–1st 3 modify #4 and lead to main thought
All deal with same topic.
[ Skip blank a moment–let’s look at the pieces! ]
Back to issue of attitude: What we think is as important as what we do.
“Thinking alike!”
NIV- “Live in harmony with one another” NAS- “Be of the same mind toward one another”
=> Lit., “thinking the same thing concerning one another” =>
Seeing others as you see yourself–
“Thinking alike” doesn’t mean have unanimous opinions on every issue–always see “eye to eye.”
Related to how we see ourselves in relation to one another–God’s perspective on ourselves
NOT thinking exalted thoughts about yourself;
No one ought to think he’s better than someone else.
But associating with poor, lowly, humble people
We’re to identify with lowly people, just like anyone else.
Don’t distinguish between people because of what they own.
That’s the world’s filter, not God’s! He doesn’t choose based on wealth!
NOT being wise in our own eyes. NIV = “do not be conceited”
We become so enraptured with our own ideas and abilities that we disregard others.
No one is justified because of his own merit.
It’s by God’s grace, through faith, we enter His presence. Therefore, . . .
3) STOP EXAGGERATING YOUR OWN IMPORTANCE! 16
Ray Stedman: "When people receive what they deserve, they’re robbed of the joy of gratitude. Instead of being thankful, we’re either resentful we didn't get more (or didn't get it sooner) or we’re arrogant because we got their way. Joy is absent. ...
What brings joy of gratitude: receiving what we don't deserve. When that happens, humility replaces pride. Thankful spirit cancels out arrogance.
DEMONSTRATION OF LOVE FOR ALL PEOPLE 12:17-19 Last 4 "HUGS"
Do good to people who mistreat us. Returns to 12:14: "Bless those who persecute you."
1) DON'T REPAY EVIL FOR EVIL 12:17a
Never shortage of people willing to mistreat us!
Attack might be totally unjustified. How do we respond?
1 Pet. 2:21-23, Jesus is our example. Who ever suffered more than He did?
Christ never responded by returning similar treatment, nor with evil speaking,
nor with threats against attackers. What did He do?
He entrusted His case to the Just Judge
God will judge justly, in the end, His justice will be evident
If Christ was willing to suffer such injustice, shouldn't we?
2) DO WHAT’S RIGHT in the sight of all people 12:17b
YOU do what’s right, whether anyone else does or not!
Not only should we avoid temptation to repay mistreatment with evil,
genuine love obligates us to seek best for others.
DON'T REPAY EVIL WITH EVIL; SEEK BEST INTERESTS OF ALL PEOPLE
3) LIVE IN PEACE WITH EVERYONE 12:18
Again there’s no distinction; we attempt to live in peace with everyone.
Boy asked, "Dad, how do wars begin?" "Well, First World War started when Germany invaded Belgium." His wife interrupted. "It began because somebody was murdered." The husband snapped back, "Are you answering the question, or am I?" Turning her back in a huff, the wife stomped out of the room and slammed door as hard as she could. Uneasy silence followed, then son spoke, "Never mind Daddy, I think I understand how wars begin!”
Peaceful relationships are 2-way street.
Our efforts don’t always produce peace; sometimes people don't respond.
Do everything possible on our part to maintain peace
When others don't respond, that’s their problem, not ours.
We’re responsible to do everything we can to make peace.
Matthew 18:21-22 Christ exhorts us to forgive those who offend us— over and over again.
Keep struggling to establish peace with those who want to fight.
Few days after Christian bought a farm, neighbor asked, "Are you new owner?" "Yes." "You’ve just bought yourself a lawsuit!" "What do you mean?" "Your fence is 10 ft on my side. I'm taking you to court." "You don’t have to do that! If fence is in wrong place, we'll move it!" Neighbor’s attitude changed. He looked at his smiling neighbor, put out his hand, "Never mind. Let's just leave it where it is!"
4) DON'T SEEK REVENGE 12:19
Instead of seeking vengeance, leave repayment in God's hands.
Principle goes against everything we’ve ever learned!
Our reaction: fight back, seek vengeance. "I'll show them who they're playing around with."
God says: "Vengeance is mine, I will repay."
He’s in charge of justice; He repays in His time.
When accounts are settled, we’ll see: God repays everyone fairly.
< Deut. 32:35. Song of Moses. Praises God; reminds people how God treats them.
Israel’s victories didn’t come because of their power.
They triumphed because God gave victory.
We have to learn that also. It's not our place to avenge ourselves.
"VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY, SAYS THE LORD!"
PRACTICAL ILLUSTRATION OF LOVE 12:20
Instead of repaying evil for evil, or seeking vengeance, love seeks good of enemy.
2 illustrations suggest ways of demonstrating love.
If he’s hungry, give him something to eat.
If he’s thirsty, give him something to drink.
> If he has some other need, try to meet that need!
You do what’s right. YOU do good to those who hurt you.
Don’t let THEIR sin drag YOU down (to their level). YOU do right.
What will be the result of that response to our enemy?
We pile coals of fire on his head.
Meaning of "coals of fire" hasn’t been defined with certainty.
Woman with ornery husband went to pastor. After listening, minister asked, "Have you tried heaping coals of fire on his head?" She replied, "No, I haven't done THAT, but I HAVE used HOT WATER!"
Refers to blow to enemy, causing strong effect.
Doing good, more effective than physical blow!
Produces stronger, more permanent result than personal attack.
SUMMARY 12:21
Corrects mistaken concept: Person who gets his way wins.
World says: “Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you!” [“and beat it!”]
Possible to win conflict with enemy, and lose battle.
Real conflict isn't between 2 people; real battle is spiritual battle.
If we struggle according to principles world fights by, evil triumphs; no matter how just our cause may be.
Evil wins when we imitate the world's pattern.
Best way to win battle: conquer evil by doing good.
Harry Fuhrman: "Years ago my grandfather raised chickens. From time to time some disappeared. Their neighbors always had chicken the next day. My grandmother wanted to tell them off. Grandfather had a better plan. He had her prepare 2 and take the savory dish, and present it with a smile. Last time!”
Love wins, even if the enemy doesn’t change!
DON'T BE DEFEATED BY EVIL BUT DEFEAT EVIL BY DOING GOOD
True triumph is to win the enemy; not to defeat him.
John Witmer: Big old sergeant asked how he came to Christ. “Young private in my company was a Christian. Rest of us gave him hard time. One night he came in tired and wet from sentry duty, kneeled beside his bunk to pray before turning in. I threw my boots at him and hit him in the side of the head. He just kept praying. Next morning I found my boots by the side of my bed, beautifully polished. I decided I wanted his Savior!”
God’s people will be known by their love—NOT by getting our way–but by LOVE!
Is there someone YOU need to hug today? Do we need to polish someone’s boots?