LOVING AS HE LOVED

Ephesians 5:1-2

"No such thing as a free lunch!"

    Similarly, some tell us, "No such thing as love with no strings attached!"

    We’ve all been influenced by popular concept:   "We love for what we get out of it!”

A dysfunctional society, filled with dysfunctional families, has defined our attitude and lifestyle!

    We’ve accepted as normal, a perversion.

        We’ve accepted it as normal in our families.

        But we’ve also accepted it as normal in God's family-the church.

DYSFUNCTIONAL LOVE

"LOVE" IN DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES

    1. LOVE MUST BE EARNED.

Dysfunctional families offer love as long as you do what’s expected!

If you keep the house clean as you should, keep the kids in line, you're loved.

If you have a good enough job, earn enough money, help out around the house, you're loved.

If you get good grades, you're loved. Come home with low marks and you're not so loved.

You're loved if you score the winning basket, but not if you miss the free throw, or the rebound.

    2. LOVE IS BASED ON PERFORMANCE.

It isn't you that is loved; it's the things you do.

If you fail to “measure up,” you’re rejected.

    3. LOVE CAN'T DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE PERSON AND WHAT THEY DO

God hates liars.    You are a liar.       God hates you.        VS.

God loves you.     God hates lies.     You sometimes lie.God loves you too much to allow you to go on lying.

God loves us.   God hates sin.  We sin.             God loves us too much to allow us to go on sinning.

BUT,—God doesn't stop loving us because we sin!

"LOVE" IN DYSFUNCTIONAL CHURCHES

Churches sometimes stop loving people who don't “measure up” to our expectations.

Churches sometimes become preoccupied with rigid rules and condemn people who don’t “measure up.”

The church creates a community where members do not experience free-flowing love for each other but rather they feel on guard and constantly in danger of condemnation.

GOD'S LOVE   [ stands in contrast to the dysfunctional love of our culture ]

    God loves us unconditionally.

    We never have to earn His love-in fact, we can't earn His love.

    The fact that God loves us unconditionally

        -doesn't mean He excuses our wrongdoing.

-nor that He won’t take corrective measures (even hard ones!)

BUT, He doesn't stop loving us when we stumble or fall.

We may not feel very loved-but we know that we are still loved.

        Because we never have to earn His love.

Since God loves us unconditionally, we reflect that love to others.

GOD'S LOVE REFLECTED IN HEALTHY FAMILIES

In a healthy family, parents love their children regardless of what they do.

Dad might say, "So you lost the election, what difference does that make? You gave it your best shot. You're still the best daughter a father could ever wish for."

Or, "Son, you could have forgotten every line in the play, and I'd still have been proud of you.

O.K. So the room wasn't as clean as it could be,

-"You're more important to us than a clean room."

-We love you too much to let the situation go unattended, but we don't reject you.

In healthy family, love isn't given or withheld on basis of performance.

GOD'S LOVE REFLECTED IN HEALTHY CHURCHES

Since God loves us unconditionally, we can extend that love to our church family.

"I accept you and love you for who you are. You don't have to conform to my standards."

But in this family we want Christ to teach us to become like Him.

        We encourage each other to that end-sometimes with "tough love," but never denying love.

    [ Ephesians 4 & 5 address this issue directly ]

Ephesians is a hymn of praise because those who were separated have been made members of God's family.

If God has accepted us without distinction, we ought to accept one another.

How WE ought to walk in the light of the great job God has done in our lives: [ 5 key phrases: “therefore, walk ...” ]

WALK IN UNITY 4:1-16

DON’T WALK LIKE PAGANS 4:17-32

2nd implication-we no longer walk as we used to.

We’ve “changed clothes”—we look different than we used to!

Speaking truthfully instead of lying 4:25

Settling anger instead of holding grudges 4:26-27

Sharing with others by working instead of stealing from others 4:28

Building up instead of tearing down 4:29-32

    [ These characteristics lead to a third implication of God's great plan. ]

WALK IN LOVE 5:1-2

If God so loved us, we ought to imitate Him and love one another.

BECOME IMITATORS OF GOD 5:1 Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children

We are to imitate God As children who are loved

Paul gives us several reasons to walk in love:

            1. We are God’s child

            2. We are God’s beloved child—He has loved us

                 Like the old phrase: “a chip off the old block”

Have you seen a small child sitting in front seat of a car, pretending he’s driving like his father?

Or walking behind him, pushing a pretend lawnmower?

                     Or, standing behind the pulpit of a church trying to preach like his dad?

                 Michael, walking like me! “You can tell whose son he is!”

If we are God’s children, we should look like Him (& act like Him!)

            God is love (1 John 4:8); therefore we are to walk in love.

            He has loved us, therefore we should love one another!

If God could love us without discrimination, we ought to treat each other that way.

We are called on to imitate God, as children who know what it means to be loved by a truly loving Father.

[In the next verse he refers to ... ]

The lifestyle: WALK IN LOVE AS CHRIST LOVED US 5:2 and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

    We are to live a life of love      As Christ loved us and gave Himself for us

“Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down His life for his friends.”John 15:13.

            Jesus went beyond that: He laid down His life for His enemies! (“While we were yet sinners...”)

Just as He loved us enough to give Himself up as an offering and sacrifice on our behalf, we ought to love one another that way.

His kind of self-sacrificing love is pleasing to God—it’s a fragrant offering—a “sweet-smelling savor” before Him!

God's kind of love-unconditional-unearned!

Impossible? Can't do it? You're right!

Rom. 5:5: It's “the love of God that is shed abroad in our hearts” by His Spirit.

                     He loves others through us.  It's HIS love-that's an unconditional love!

HOW CAN WE SHOW OUR LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER?

Charles Lake: Received anniversary card from Dennis for 20 years.... Over 25 years ago he was in a service where I spoke. I had to run to catch a plane; he approached me when I had no time to give. He was depressed and he said to me, "If life doesn't change, I wish it would end." I looked at Dennis as I was being driven away, and said, "Dennis, the pastor here can help you."... "But Dennis, just this word I pray you'll never forget. There will never be a day in your life when God loves you more than He loves you right now."

    Isn't it wonderful to be loved like that?

Do YOU understand that there will never be a day in your life when God will love you more than He loves you now? Why? Because we can't earn God's love!

        He loves us. Period.

God loves us unconditionally.

    He forgives faults and failures.

    He responds to hurt, failure, and sin, with compassion and forgiveness.

    But He still wants us to become all that we can become for His glory.

That’s the way God wants us to care for one another.

    This is different than our society’s kind of love—It’s unconditional!

A healthy family: -loves unconditionally

    -accepts people who differ

-overlooks faults and idiosyncracies of others

-responds to hurt, failure, or sin, with compassion and forgiveness

    -grows together to become all that God wants us to be

It will do something for us, as we learn to love others as Christ loves and to affirm one another in genuine love.

    Always affirming; always building up; always edifying.

That was our Lord's style, and He said, "Love one another, as I have loved you.”